10/19/2007

3 Things I Don't Like (Two of Which Give Me the Gags)...

I had to go to the grocery store tonight to pick up some things and, as I was rounding a corner from one aisle to the next, I spotted something that made me shiver. Editor's Note: No, it wasn't because I was in the frozen food section. So, I thought I'd make a list of things that make me shiver (because they gross me out) or give me the gags. I'd almost go as far as to say that, along with these things, they would be my kryptonite...

  • Orange Juice With Pulp
    I've always had a thing with OJ with pulp. I feel like a blue whale trying to use its baleen to sift out krill. Pulp is something that God never meant for humans to consume. It is, essentially, evil concentrate. That's why Quentin Tarantino used it in naming one of his most violently sodomistic films...

  • Guacamole
    I had never actually seen guacamole before moving to Cali in 2003 and, upon trying it, discovered that it was a fast trigger for my gag reflex. Seriously, I just can't handle it. Which makes the next thing even more gross...

  • California Rolls
    Now, amongst those who find themselves in my inner circle, it's common knowledge that sushi (of any kind) gives me the gags. California Rolls, on the other hand, are like a death ray to me. Not only do they have raw fish (gags: part 1), but they have avacado (gags: part 2). So, as you can see, they're like the perfect gags storm...
  • 5 comments:

    Lauren Faiai said...

    Josh- BRO!! You are missing out!! OJ with Pulp, Guac, and California Rolls are 3 of God's GREATEST creations!! Except, that "Guacamole dip" you have in your fridge isn't guacamole. It's sour cream with green food coloring. Also...for your info...California Rolls don't have RAW fish. They have cooked crab...and the kind at the store is imitation. You need to come with me and Steve to Arigato for some real sushi.

    Creative Mess said...

    I ditto that...the C rolls are fake Krab...with a K, and it's the only roll i can eat right now being pregnant because there isn't any raw fish in it! You've got to get some nice expensive sushi... not the store bought kind!

    Josh(ua) Treece said...

    The guac isn't in my fridge. I could never have it in my fridge. All of the pics are from the store. And I can't do ANY sushi! I ALWAYS get the gags.

    Dr.John said...

    I have the same gag reflex as you and just looking at the pictures amost triggered it.

    Stacy said...

    That jar of guacamole looks an awful lot like the jar of facial mask clay that's in my medicine cabinet. Ewwww.

    Stopped in because Dr. John recommended your blog. You're funny dude, but then most youth pastors are.