5/20/2008

I've Got a Crush On You...

What? Two American Gladiators posts in two days!?! Oh yeah. Why? Read on...

As I watched last night's episode of American Gladiators (which shall, henceforth in this post, be referred to as "AG"), I decided that, out of all of their musclebound, spandex-clad, television warriors, only two stand apart as being attractive. Those two are...

Gina "Crush" Carrano and Jennifer "Phoenix" Widerstrom

Here's some background info on Crush and Phoenix...

Now, before you start leaving comments like, "Josh, how could you find these amazons attractive in any way?" or "Josh, you must be hyped up on 'roids to think these "ladies" are hot." (a common misconception) or "Josh, they could beat you up on your best day.", let me strike preemptively and list out my reasons for thinking it a good idea to want to date either one of these feminine fighters...

Josh's Reasons for Wanting to Date an American Gladiator
1) Free tickets to the show... (If you grew up in the 80's, and you're a dude, you have to love this show. It's the law.)

2) I'd no longer have to go to the gym to build up my own musculature for the purposes of "defending my woman". In fact, I'd probably begin to invite guys to hit on her, just so I could then watch her hit on them...

3) I'd finally get the chance to run around in one of those giant hamster balls...

4) I'd get to meet Hulk Hogan...

5) I'd no longer have to be the one asked to open the jar, carry something to the car, or lift anything...

And there you have it: five inarguable reasons why I have a crush on these two AGs.

I love logic...

3 comments:

Courtney said...

HAAA HAAA HAA! What happened to Helga...to much of a dude for you?

Josh(ua) Treece said...

She didn't make the cut.

Sarah said...

Why do you have to be a dude to like AG!? Sexist! Well, I guess it helped that I had an older brother that wouldn't let anything else be watched but still!